The Big 6-0

It’s my birthday month. There was a long standing joke where I worked that the month you were born was your birthday month and you got to milk it for all it was worth. ” I’m going out to lunch, it’s my birthday month”, “I ate dessert, again, it’s my birthday month”, “I bought this new designer something, it’s my birthday month”. You see where I’m going?

Well, this birthday is different. It’s a milestone, 60. I no longer want or need to justify lunch, dessert or designer anything. Basically, if I want it, I go get it. But I just don’t care about that stuff much. I have less years ahead of me than behind me (way less) so stuff is just stuff.

The stuff that matters is how people treat you from a stranger to your “loved ones” to your close friends to your acquaintances.

This year I want respect. I want unconditional love. Would I like to weigh 20 lbs less? You bet. But that’s kind of falling into the “stuff” category now. Maybe my expectations are too high. Maybe I want more out of people.

I have tried to take care of people, tried to be kind, treat others at least as well as I’ve been treated. But you know what? It’s taken me 60 years to realize it, but people AREN’T going to treat you like you want to be treated.

Now don’t worry. Negative Nancy isn’t back. But as I start my next 60 years, lol, my patience is shorter, my heart hurts quicker and more intensely, my forgiveness comes slower. Some might say I’m more bitter but I think I’m just more cautious with my heart and feelings. I call it filtering out things or filtering stuff.

So here I go, into a new decade, full of different things. More aches, gray hair and focus on non-stuff but less balance, hearing and patience. My goal is to get into the next decade, intact, keeping those in my life that love and respect me, not chasing those that don’t.